The Monsoon Boystown Adventure

My sister showed me this blog (Hyperbole and a Half). It's really funny, and now I envision my life in paint pictures. Last night would have made for some awesome pictures, but the idea has been taken, so I'll just tell the story.

Last night Amy asked me if I would go to a Halloween [birthday] party (yes, it is July) in the city with her so she wouldn't have to drive alone. I said sure because what else would I do with my life? She picked me up and she said she was hungry. We decided to go to Taco Hut (Taco Bell + Pizza Hut) but get our drinks at McDonald's since they have Diet Coke. When we got our food we were also given a drink that we did not order. We couldn't tell what it was. It tasted like regular Coke, but this is a Pepsi place. Then we found out that Amy's pizza was pepperoni instead of cheese. So we had to go back and wait for a cheese pizza.

At this point it was raining, but not anything intense. Then we got on the expressway. We could barely see! It was definitely a monsoon. We stayed in our lane by following the guy in front of us. When we got to the city the rain wasn't any better and we knew we'd get soaked. However, while looking for a parking spot we found a deformed umbrella lying on the edge of the street. We pulled over and stole it. It certainly came in good use.

At one bar a man came up to me (I can only assume he's gay since we're in Boystown) and said, "I'm probably gonna get hit, but you're one of the most naturally beautiful woman I've seen." SCORE! That made my life, actually. Later in the night Amy and I were sitting at a table and the same man walked by and noticed us sitting there. He quickly said he'd leave, as if we were threatening people. Then Amy said, "I think he thinks we're lesbians." As we were leaving Amy and I were holding hands (so we wouldn't lose each other in the crowd) and someone else shouted "lesbians!" Really? I feel bad for real lesbians now if that's the kind of stuff they have to put up with!

I think I met a straight boy though (don't worry, I'm still with Steve)! Who woulda thought?! This guy was kinda standing in the way while texting. I moved around him and he said something along the lines of "Hey now! Calm down!" I replied, "I just wanna leave!" He said he was joking. Then my nonsober friend, who will remain anonymous here, started to be aggressive with this dude. He looked at me and said, "I'm really a nice person!" I told him I believed him. Then he said he was a "nice, straight guy." I told him that there weren't many of him left (nice or straight) and to stay that way.

On the way home it was still monsooning. There were huge puddles underneath the overpasses. Despite being in a pickup truck, Amy was nervous about going through the swimming pools caused by the monsoon. So then we drove around pretending to figure out a way home. Eventually we just decided that we were gonna do it anyway. We survived with no harm done, of course. That's the story. It kinda just ends like that.